網誌分類：Good moods, Bad moods |
Enneagram Type 4:
Individualist, Artist, Over-Analyzer, Mystic or Melodramatic Elitist
Overview
You want to be gifted, intuitive, original and unique. More
importantly, you want to be passionate, true to your feelings and
uniquely authentic. You see yourself as sensitive, expressive and
spiritual. You would like others to see you as idealistic, emotionally
deep and compassionate. Your idealized image is that you are
accomplished and special.
Motivated
by the need to understand and to be understood, you desire experiences
that are rich with feeling and meaning. You may find it easier to deal
with painful emotions than to deal with the tedium of daily routine.
You have the temperament of an artist and long to freely express
yourself. You feel your emotions deeply and are not afraid to go
emotionally where others fear to tread. This includes having an
exquisite, intuitive ability to distinguish between subtle emotions
that others often miss. Painfully self-conscious, you are often overly
focused on how different you are from others. A true humanitarian, you
have a natural passion for protest. At times intense and contrary, you
are not afraid to think for yourself and voice your point of view.
Nostalgic by nature, you often focus on past experiences. This can lead
you to deeper insights or to downward spirals of melancholy and/or
painful unresolved feelings. Craving ideal circumstances or love, you
often ruminate on what is missing and perceived to be important. Your
tendency towards self-absorption is both an asset and liability. It can
lead you to deep personal insights that can benefit everyone while
feeding your self-deprecating sense of humor; but it can also make you
appear to be self centered and disinterested in others. Feeling your
own inner world so powerfully, it is good to remember that others’
experiences are just as real for them as yours are for you.
When you step out of the river of your emotions, you can bring forth
your many talents into the world and express them in a way that is
extraordinary and original. You are like the lotus flower growing in
the mud that is able to transform emotionally painful experiences into
fertilizer for personal growth. Attuned to feelings, you have an
uncommon sensitivity when it comes to dealing with suffering. You are
not afraid to hear about someone else’s troubles, and you can be a
great friend to anyone in emotional pain.
Need
You need be seen as artistic, gifted and accomplished. You focus on
your individuality and on carving your own distinct image. You need to
express your deep feelings and want others to validate your emotions.
Whether you are organizing your living space to reflect your refined
tastes or engaging in an artistic pursuit, it is essential for your
sense of well being that you express your creativity.
Avoid
You
avoid feeling lost, disorientated and without personal significance,
meaning or direction. You also avoid appearing inadequate, defective or
flawed. Most importantly, you have a hidden fear of being emotionally
cut off and abandoned. You avoid affectation and anything dull,
ordinary, ugly, vulgar, inauthentic or distasteful.
Virtue
Your
greatest strengths are your deep intuition, creativity and ability to
transform painful life experiences into opportunities for profound
growth and healing. This enables you to identify what is missing, and
like a knight on a quest, you search until you find it or create it.
Astute about human nature, you believe that everyone is an individual
and that all emotions have value. Profound and insightful, you have an
uncanny knack for transforming the dull and the ordinary into the
exciting and extraordinary. You are able to see and appreciate what is
truly unique, special and rare.
Vice
Your
vice is envy. You’re always worrying that others may have gotten a
better deal than you or are being recognized while your talents are
being overlooked. Hyper-sensitive, you can be moody, haughty and overly
emotional, always seeing the grass as greener and the glass half empty.
You can be self-absorbed and temperamental, and tend to
over-personalize all life experiences and interactions with others.
Capable of being emotionally manipulating or overly critical, you are
often unaware of the impact your emotional nature has on others.
Remember, that you are like a mystic who sees ‘the river beneath the
river’ and are not just the swamp of your emotions.
Attention
Your attention goes to searching for meaning, noticing what is missing,
feelings of melancholy and nostalgia, and longing for the unavailable.
You appreciate the special, the humane and the beautiful. You like to
put your personal signature on everything that you do. Your refined
tastes make you a great critic and someone who appreciates the truly
exceptional.
Spiritual Path
Your spiritual journey is to connect to original source and create true
meaning. Spiritual growth will come to you when you are able to balance
your emotional nature with temperance and equanimity. Keep your
powerful emotions in check, and you can create the kind of life that
you want.
Mantra
Don’t
dwell on the past, and remember to enjoy the pleasure that can be found
in each moment. When you have gratitude and the courage to move through
your fear of rejection and share your talents, others will honor your
original and creative contributions.
Wing
If you are the Enneagram Type 4 with the 3 Wing, you desire to appear genteel. You see you yourself as fiery, passionate, expressive, energetic, beautiful, and kind.
If you are the Enneagram Type 4 with the 5 Wing, you desire to be avant-garde. You see yourself as original, sincere, mysterious, subtle, artistic and independent.
Famous 4s
Francis Bacon, John Barrymore, Ingmar Bergman, Peter Bogdanovich,
Marlon Brando, Jackson Browne, Raymond Burr, Kate Bush, Mary Chapin
Carpenter, Prince Charles, Eric Clapton, Kurt Cobain, Judy Collins,
James Dean, Johnny Depp, Neil Diamond, Isak Dinesen, Bob Dylan, Judy
Garland, Martha Graham, Billie Holliday, Lena Horne, Julio Iglesias,
Jeremy Irons, Michael Jackson, Jewel, Angelina Jolie, Janis Joplin,
Harvey Keitel, Charles Laughton, T. E. Lawrence, Vivien Leigh, Rod
McKuen, Thomas Merton, Joni Mitchell, Jim Morrison, Morrissey, Edvard
Munch, Liam Neeson, Stevie Nicks, Anais Nin, Nick Nolte, Laurence
Olivier, Paris, Edith Piaf, Pink Floyd, Sylvia Plath, Edgar Allen Poe,
Prince, Anne Rice, Percy Shelley, Simone Signoret, Paul Simon, Meryl
Streep, James Taylor, Spencer Tracy, Vincent Van Gogh, Orson Welles,
Tennessee Williams, Kate Winslet, Virginia Woolf.
All content Katherine Chernick Fauvre, David W. Fauvre, Enneagram Explorations, © 1995-2007
For more about the meaning of the arrows, see below.
Fours are self-aware, sensitive, and reserved. They are emotionally honest, creative, and personal, but can also be moody and self-conscious. Withholding themselves from others due to feeling vulnerable and defective, they can also feel disdainful and exempt from ordinary ways of living. They typically have problems with melancholy, self-indulgence, and self-pity. At their Best: inspired and highly creative, they are able to renew themselves and transform their experiences.
Key Motivations: Want to express themselves and their individuality, to create and surround themselves with beauty, to maintain certain moods and feelings, to withdraw to protect their self-image, to take care of emotional needs before attending to anything else, to attract a "rescuer."
When moving in their Direction of Disintegration (stress), aloof Fours suddenly become over-involved and clinging at Two. However, when moving in their Direction of Integration (growth), envious, emotionally turbulent Fours become more objective and principled, like healthy Ones. For more information, click here.
Examples: Ingmar Bergman, Alan Watts, Sarah McLachlan, Alanis Morrisette, Paul Simon, Jeremy Irons, Patrick Stewart, Joseph Fiennes, Martha Graham, Bob Dylan, Miles Davis, Johnny Depp, Anne Rice, Rudolph Nureyev, J.D. Salinger, Anaîs Nin, Marcel Proust, Maria Callas, Tennessee Williams, Edgar Allan Poe, Annie Lennox, Prince, Michael Jackson, Virginia Woolf, Judy Garland, "Blanche DuBois" (Streetcar Named Desire), Thomas Merton.
We have named this type The Individualist because Fours maintain their identity by seeing themselves as fundamentally different from others. Fours feel that they are unlike other human beings, and consequently, that no one can understand them or love them adequately. They often see themselves as uniquely talented, possessing special, one-of-a-kind gifts, but also as uniquely disadvantaged or flawed. More than any other type, Fours are acutely aware of and focused on their personal differences and deficiencies.
Healthy Fours are honest with themselves: they own all of their feelings and can look at their motives, contradictions, and emotional conflicts without denying or whitewashing them. They may not necessarily like what they discover, but they do not try to rationalize their states, nor do they try to hide them from themselves or others. They are not afraid to see themselves “warts and all.” Healthy Fours are willing to reveal highly personal and potentially shameful things about themselves because they are determined to understand the truth of their experience—so that they can discover who they are and come to terms with their emotional history. This ability also enables Fours to endure suffering with a quiet strength. Their familiarity with their own darker nature makes it easier for them to process painful experiences that might overwhelm other types.
Nevertheless, Fours often report that they feel they are missing something in themselves, although they may have difficulty identifying exactly what that “something” is. Is it will power? Social ease? Self-confidence? Emotional tranquility?—all of which they see in others, seemingly in abundance. Given time and sufficient perspective, Fours generally recognize that they are unsure about aspects of their self-image—their personality or ego-structure itself. They feel that they lack a clear and stable identity, particularly a social persona that they feel comfortable with.
While it is true that Fours often feel different from others, they do not really want to be alone. They may feel socially awkward or self-conscious, but they deeply wish to connect with people who understand them and their feelings. The “romantics” of the Enneagram, they long for someone to come into their lives and appreciate the secret self that they have privately nurtured and hidden from the world. If, over time, such validation remains out of reach, Fours begin to build their identity around how unlike everyone else they are. The outsider therefore comforts herself by becoming an insistent individualist: everything must be done on her own, in her own way, on her own terms. Fours’ mantra becomes “I am myself. Nobody understands me. I am different and special,” while they secretly wish they could enjoy the easiness and confidence that others seem to enjoy.
Fours typically have problems with a negative self-image and chronically low self-esteem. They attempt to compensate for this by cultivating a Fantasy Self—an idealized self-image which is built up primarily in their imaginations. A Four we know shared with us that he spent most of his spare time listening to classical music while fantasizing about being a great concert pianist—à la Vladimir Horowitz. Unfortunately, his commitment to practicing fell far short of his fantasized self-image, and he was often embarrassed when people asked him to play for them. His actual abilities, while not poor, became sources of shame.
In the course of their lives, Fours may try several different identities on for size, basing them on styles, preferences, or qualities they find attractive in others. But underneath the surface, they still feel uncertain about who they really are. The problem is that they base their identity largely on their feelings. When Fours look inward they see a kaleidoscopic, ever-shifting pattern of emotional reactions. Indeed, Fours accurately perceive a truth about human nature—that it is dynamic and ever changing. But because they want to create a stable, reliable identity from their emotions, they attempt to cultivate only certain feelings while rejecting others. Some feelings are seen as “me,” while others are “not me.” By attempting to hold on to specific moods and express others, Fours believe that they are being true to themselves.
One of the biggest challenges Fours face is learning to let go of feelings from the past; they tend to nurse wounds and hold onto negative feelings about those who have hurt them. Indeed, Fours can become so attached to longing and disappointment that they are unable to recognize the many treasures in their lives.
Leigh is a working mother who has struggled with these difficult feelings for many years.
“I collapse when I am out in the world. I have had a trail of relationship disasters. I have hated my sister’s goodness—and hated goodness in general. I went years without joy in my life, just pretending to smile because real smiles would not come to me. I have had a constant longing for whatever I cannot have. My longings can never become fulfilled because I now realize that I am attached to ‘the longing’ and not to any specific end result.”
There is a Sufi story that relates to this about an old dog that had been badly abused and was near starvation. One day, the dog found a bone, carried it to a safe spot, and started gnawing away. The dog was so hungry that it chewed on the bone for a long time and got every last bit of nourishment that it could out of it. After some time, a kind old man noticed the dog and its pathetic scrap and began quietly setting food out for it. But the poor hound was so attached to its bone that it refused to let go of it and soon starved to death.
Fours are in the same predicament. As long as they believe that there is something fundamentally wrong with them, they cannot allow themselves to experience or enjoy their many good qualities. To acknowledge their good qualities would be to lose their sense of identity (as a suffering victim) and to be without a relatively consistent personal identity (their Basic Fear). Fours grow by learning to see that much of their story is not true—or at least it is not true any more. The old feelings begin to fall away once they stop telling themselves their old tale: it is irrelevant to who they are right now.
(from The Wisdom of the Enneagram, p. 180-182)
Excerpt from Type Four
ITAR (4:40 minutes) 
Buy the Individual Type Audio Recording of Type Four—Click Here
Level 1 (At Their Best): Profoundly creative, expressing the personal and the universal, possibly in a work of art. Inspired, self-renewing and regenerating: able to transform all their experiences into something valuable: self-creative.
Level 2: Self-aware, introspective, on the "search for self," aware of feelings and inner impulses. Sensitive and intuitive both to self and others: gentle, tactful, compassionate.
Level 3: Highly personal, individualistic, "true to self." Self-revealing, emotionally honest, humane. Ironic view of self and life: can be serious and funny, vulnerable and emotionally strong.
Level 4: Take an artistic, romantic orientation to life, creating a beautiful, aesthetic environment to cultivate and prolong personal feelings. Heighten reality through fantasy, passionate feelings, and the imagination.
Level 5: To stay in touch with feelings, they interiorize everything, taking everything personally, but become self-absorbed and introverted, moody and hypersensitive, shy and self-conscious, unable to be spontaneous or to "get out of themselves." Stay withdrawn to protect their self-image and to buy time to sort out feelings.
Level 6: Gradually think that they are different from others, and feel that they are exempt from living as everyone else does. They become melancholy dreamers, disdainful, decadent, and sensual, living in a fantasy world. Self-pity and envy of others leads to self-indulgence, and to becoming increasingly impractical, unproductive, effete, and precious.
Level 7: When dreams fail, become self-inhibiting and angry at self, depressed and alienated from self and others, blocked and emotionally paralyzed. Ashamed of self, fatigued and unable to function.
Level 8: Tormented by delusional self-contempt, self-reproaches, self-hatred, and morbid thoughts: everything is a source of torment. Blaming others, they drive away anyone who tries to help them.
Level 9: Despairing, feel hopeless and become self-destructive, possibly abusing alcohol or drugs to escape. In the extreme: emotional breakdown or suicide is likely. Generally corresponds to the Avoidant, Depressive, and Narcissistic personality disorders.
In the artist of all kinds I think one can detect an inherent dilemma, which belongs to the co-existence of two trends, the urgent need to communicate and the still more urgent need not to be found....
What more fruitful way to redressing the balance than by portraying one's inner world in a work of art and then persuading other people to accept it, if not as real, at least as highly significant? Part of the satisfaction which a creative person obtains from his achievement may be the feeling that, at last, some part of his inner life is being accepted which has never been accorded recognition before. Moreover, since art became an individual matter rather than a task for anonymous craftsmen, creative work is generally recognized as being especially apt for expressing the personal style of an individual (which is of course closely related to his inner world). The value we place upon authenticity is often exaggerated; yet there is a sense in which it is justified. However good a painting or a piece of music may be, taken quite apart from its creator, the fact that it is or is not another expression of the personality of a particular artist is important. For it either is or is not an addition to our knowledge of that artist; a further revelation of that mysterious, indefinable and fascinating thing—his personality. (D. W. Winnicott, quoted in Anthony Storr, The Dynamics of Creation, 58.)
The nature of creativity will probably always remain mysterious because its basis is irrational—in the feelings and unconscious of those who create—and because, as Winnicott notes, part of the motive for creating is to remain concealed, to be unfound by others. Yet the motives given for artistic work—to communicate and to conceal the self—are but two possible motives which any person may have for creating. These two motives are, however, particularly appropriate to the Four, the artistic temperament among the personality types. Of course, members of any other personality type can become artists in the sense of making a livelihood by producing works of art, however that is defined. Fours, however, are in search of their identities, and art is the foremost means they have of finding themselves, as well as their way of reporting to the world what they have discovered.
The Four is the personality type which emphasizes the subjective world of feelings, in creativity and individualism, in introversion and self-absorption, and in self-torment and self-hatred. In this personality type we see creative artists, romantic aesthetes, and withdrawn dreamers, people with powerful feelings who feel different from others because self-consciousness blocks them from getting outside themselves.
Fours are the most self-aware of the types, and this is the basis of what is most positive and negative about them. The constant conflict we see in Fours is between their need to be aware of themselves, so they can find themselves, and, at the same time, their need to move beyond self-awareness, so they will not be trapped in self-consciousness. The tension between self-awareness and self-transcendence can be resolved in creativity. In the creative moment, healthy Fours harness their emotions without constricting them, not only producing something beautiful but discovering who they are. In the moment of inspiration, they are, paradoxically both most themselves and most liberated from themselves. This is why all forms of creativity are so valued by Fours, and why in its inspired state, creativity is so hard to sustain. Fours can be inspired only if they have first transcended themselves, something which is extremely threatening to their self-awareness. In a sense, then, only by learning not to look for themselves will they find themselves and renew themselves in the process.
The problem with average Fours, however, is that they try to understand themselves by introspecting upon their feelings. As they move inward in a search for self, they become so acutely self-conscious that their subjective emotional states become the dominant reality for them. And, because even average Fours are so involved with their emotions, they do not usually express their feelings directly. Instead, they communicate their feelings indirectly though art, if they have they talent and training to do so.
The overall direction of their personalities therefore is inward, toward increasing self-absorption, because Fours feel that they are different from other people, and they want to know why they feel this way. Ironically, however, they try to find their place in life by withdrawing from it so they can trace the labyrinth of their emotions. But the result of their withdrawal is that even average Fours have noticeable difficulties coping with life, while unhealthy Fours have some of the most severe emotional difficulties of all the personality types.
Fours tend to compound their emotional difficulties in some striking ways. Because Fours have identified themselves with their feelings, they begin to look for intensity of feeling in all of their activities. The more intensely they feel something the more real they feel. Thus, average Fours begin to employ their imaginations to "stir up" their emotional life. They can take even the most transitory encounter and dwell on it for hours to extract all of its "emotional juice." The problem is that it becomes difficult for Fours to dwell deeply in their moods and fantasies if they are still interacting with others. Their feeling states and self-image become rarefied to a degree that reality will not support. Increasingly, they begin to withdraw from life and real relationships and experiences, both to prevent others from interfering with their strong reveries and moods, and to avoid potential embarrassment and humiliation. As they draw the curtains and turn away from life, however, they cut themselves off from the wellspring of their feelings and their creativity—participation in the world.
In healthy Fours, however, the rich life of the unconscious becomes accessible and is given shape. More than any other personality type, healthy Fours are the bridge between the spiritual and the animal in human nature because they are so aware of these two sides of themselves. They sense in themselves the depths to which human beings can descend, as well as the heights to which they can be swept up. No other personality type is as habitually aware of the potentials and predicaments of human nature: human beings are spiritual animals occupying an uneasy place between two orders of existence. Fours sense both sides of their potentially conflicting natures, and they suffer intensely or are ecstatic because of them. This is why, at their best, healthy Fours create something which can move others deeply because they have been able to get in touch with the hidden depths of human nature by delving deeply into their own. By doing so, they transcend themselves, and are able to discover something universal about human nature, fusing personal conflicts and divergent feelings into art.
But, like everyone else, most Fours do not live at the peak of their potential. In response to anxiety, they turn inward, becoming self-conscious, particularly about the negativity they discover in themselves. To offset their negative feelings, they use their imaginations to make their lives more bearable. As a result, average Fours begin to withdraw from ordinary life. They become self-absorbed and do not learn how to relate to people or how to manage in the practical world. They feel like outsiders, somehow flawed and different from others, unable to break through the barrier of self-consciousness that separates them from easy commerce with the world.
And if they are unhealthy, their negative feelings feed upon themselves because Fours have closed themselves off from any other influences. Unhealthy Fours are so completely alienated from others, and ironically, even from themselves, that they despair of ever finding a way out of their excruciating self-consciousness. They realize that their search for self has led them into a world of useless fantasies and illusions. Understanding only too clearly what they have done to themselves, and fearing that it is too late to do anything about it, unhealthy Fours hate and torment themselves, turning against themselves to destroy what they have become.
Fours find it difficult to transcend self-consciousness because just the reverse is what they want: to become more conscious of their states and feelings so that they can find themselves and arrive at a firm sense of identity. But as they become more self-conscious, Fours become increasingly drawn into unresolved, contradictory, and irrational feelings which they want to sort out before they dare express them.
Self-discovery is an extremely important motive for Fours because they never feel that their sense of self is strong enough to sustain their identities, particularly if they need to assert themselves. Because their feelings change so readily, their sense of identity is not solid, dependable, in their own hands. They feel undefined and uncertain of themselves, as if they were a gathering cloud which may produce something of great power or merely dissipate in the next breeze. Fours can never tell how the next moment will affect them, so it is difficult for them to count on themselves. Something is missing in the self, something they cannot quite put their fingers on, but which they feel they lack nonetheless.
The difficulty is that average Fours may not know what their feelings are until after they have expressed them personally or artistically. But if they express all that they feel, they fear that they may reveal too much, exposing themselves to shame or punishment. On the other hand, by not expressing their feelings, average Fours undermine the possibility of discovering themselves by getting caught in endless self-absorption. They become aware of being aware of themselves—their consciousness is filled with little more than fantasies and memories, ultimately leading to illusions, regrets, and a wasted life.
As Fours become more fearful that they cannot find a solid identity in themselves, they begin to create one out of whatever random tendencies they find. Thus, matters of taste, likes and dislikes, and emotional reactions become the materials which Fours use to construct an identity. Because their sense of self is so tenuous, however, Fours begin to put a great deal of weight on what would be for others relatively unimportant traits. ("I only wear black." "I listen to Puccini, but never Wagner.") It is important to note that most of these personal traits function by negation. Fours may not know who they are, but they certainly believe they know who they are not. While these idiosyncrasies can be fairly harmless in and of themselves, as Fours increasingly depend on them to figure out who they are, they begin to paint themselves into a corner. In the interest of maintain a narrowly defined self-image, Fours may refuse to engage in many basic activities necessary to live their lives. ("Poets don’t work in an office.")
As we have seen in the other types of the Feeling Center, the Two and the Three, much of the Four’s energy goes into maintaining a consistent self-image which is somehow at odds with the real, essential self. Twos did this by looking for others to respond to their goodness in ways that would make them feel lovable. Threes kept their self-image intact by getting validation for their achievements and giving themselves inner "pep talks." Fours do something akin to the inner talk of the Threes in that they maintain the sense of identity through a continuous inner dialogue and referencing of their emotional reactions. Of course, Fours want someone to validate their self-images, too, but they are less dependent on the affirmation of others than Twos or Threes. In fact, much of their identity is tied to their feelings about not having the affirmation of others. Feeling different and misunderstood is as central to the Four’s false self-image as being only good and loving is to the Two’s or being a totally competent "winner" is to the Three’s.
Fours are disconnected from both parents. As children, they did not identify with either their mothers or their fathers. ("I am not like my mother; I am not like my father.") They may have had either unhappy or solitary childhoods as a result of their parents' marital problems, divorce, illness, or simply because of personality conflicts within the family. In some cases, Fours may have had relatively "normal," uneventful childhoods. Nonetheless, even with a supportive environment, they did not see themselves reflected in either parent: they felt that their parents did not see them as they actually were or that what their parents conveyed to them was somehow irrelevant. Lacking definitive role models, Fours as children turned inward to their feelings and imaginations as the primary sources of information about themselves from which they could construct their identities.
From childhood, Fours felt essentially alone in life. It seemed to them that, for some reason they could not understand, their parents had rejected them, or at least, that their parents did not take much interest in them. Fours therefore felt that there must be something deeply wrong with them, that they were somehow defective because their parents did not give them the kind of nurturing attention which, as children, they needed. As a result, they turned to themselves to discover who they are.
Self-knowledge became their most important goal, the means by which they hoped to fit into the world. Fours felt that if they could discover who they are, they would not feel so different from others in the deep, essential way that they do. However, instead of creating themselves through introspection, Fours ironically become trapped in self-consciousness. Their self-consciousness alienates them, making them feel vulnerable and arouses their aggressions at themselves and others, particularly their parents. But because they also feel powerless to express their aggressions or to do anything about their condition, they withdraw from their parents and from others, turning their aggressions mostly against themselves.
Because the formative relationship with their parents was primarily one of disconnection, Fours also begin to develop a sense of ego identity based on their difference from others. There were few qualities in their parents that they identified with, so Fours began to inventory all the things that they were not—all of the ways in which they were unlike the people around them. Eventually, this sense of difference becomes a strongly developed and defended part of their self-image and many Fours have difficulty seeing the many ways in which they are like everyone else. To be "ordinary" becomes a frightening prospect, since a sense of "being unique" feels like one of the only stable building blocks of their identity.
Their disconnect from their parents also produces a longing for the "good parent"—the person who will see them as they truly are and validate the self they are trying to construct. Fours usually experience this as a longing for an ideal mate or partner. They will often project this role onto new acquaintances, idealizing them and fantasizing about the wonderful life they will have together. Unfortunately, as Fours get to know the person better, they become disenchanted, realizing that the other is not the "good parent" who will rescue them from all their problems. He or she is just another human being with flaws and shortcomings. The other’s "blemishes" soon become the focus of the Four’s attention, and they lose interest in the person. Before long they are back to their search and fantasizing again, but generally with less hope of finding the person "of their dreams."
Like Twos and Threes, the other two personality types of the Feeling Center, Fours have a problem with hostility. They direct their hostility at themselves because like the Twos and Threes, Fours have rejected their real self in favor of an idealized self-image. However, because of their self-awareness, Fours are always becoming conscious of all of the ways in which they are not like their idealized self. They come to disdain many of their real qualities which they see as barriers to becoming the self of their imagination. Angry with themselves for being defective, Fours inhibit and punish themselves in the many ways which we will see.
Of course, Fours also experience hostility toward others. They can become enraged if others question or dismiss their self-image or moods, but they tend to express this by "dropping" people, suddenly and without explanation. The creativity of Fours can also be employed in sarcastic, withering remarks directed at those who have wounded their "sensitivities." Fours also can experience intense hostility at the very people they have idealized. When others fail to live up to Fours’ hopes of the "good parent," they may relive the original pain they felt at not being able to connect with their parents, but project this onto the new love interest. They may dramatically express the rage and emotionality that they could not with their own parents, but usually withdraw quickly before the intensity of their feelings overwhelms them or does further damage to their relationships. More often, Fours will simmer and seethe in silence.
On a deep, unconscious level Fours are hostile toward their parents because they feel that their parents did not nurture them properly. Fours feel that they were not welcomed into the world; they feel out of place, unwanted—and they are deeply enraged at their parents for doing this to them. However, their rage at their parents is so deep that Fours cannot allow themselves to express it. They fear their own anger, and so withhold it, trying to come to terms with it themselves.
As awareness of their hostility and negative feelings gradually wears them out, average to unhealthy Fours sink ever more deeply into self-doubt, depression, and despair. They spend most of their time searching for the courage to go on living despite the overwhelming sense that the essential flaw in themselves is so deep that it cannot be healed. Indeed, the feeling of hopelessness is the current against which they must constantly swim. And if the undertow of hopelessness is too strong, unhealthy Fours either succumb to an emotional breakdown, or commit suicide because they despair of ever breaking free of it.
As soon as Fours devote themselves to a search for self by withdrawing from life, they are going in the wrong direction. No matter how necessary this search may seem to them, they must become convinced that the direct search for self is a temptation which eventually leads to despair.
On the other hand, what makes healthy Fours healthy is not that they have freed themselves once and for all from the turbulence of their emotions, but that they have found a way to ride that current to some further destination. Healthy Fours have learned to sustain their identities without exclusive reference to their feelings. By overcoming the temptation to withdraw from life to search for themselves, they will not only save themselves from their own destructiveness, they will be able to bring something beautiful and good into existence. If they learn to live this way, Fours can be among the most life-enhancing of the personality types bringing good out of evil, hope from hopelessness, meaning from absurdity, and saving what appeared to be lost.
(from Personality Types, p. 135-143)
The Enneagram Institute is a Service Mark of Enneagram Personality Types, Inc.
All Images, Content and Layout Copyright The Enneagram Institute 1998-2008.
Identity seekers, who feel unique and different
People
of this personality type tend to build their identities around their
perception of themselves as being somehow different or unique; they are
thus self-consciously individualistic. Fours tend to see their
difference from others as being both a gift and a curse - a gift,
because it sets them apart from those they perceive as being somehow
"common," and a curse, as it so often seems to separate them from the
simpler forms of happiness that others so readily seem to enjoy. Thus,
Fours can manage to feel superior to others while also secretly
harboring some degree of longing and envy. A feeling of being a member
of the "true aristocracy" alternates with deep feelings of shame, and
fears of somehow being deeply flawed or defective.
Fours are emotionally complex and highly sensitive. They long to be understood and appreciated for their authentic selves, but easily feel misunderstood and unappreciated. They have a tendency to withdraw in the face of a world that seems harsh or crude, and are often somewhat moody or temperamental. They are emotionally centered and spend much of their lives immersed in their internal mental landscapes, where they feel free to cultivate and analyse their feelings. A desire to manifest this internal world often leads Fours to an interest in the arts, and some do become actual artists. Whether artistic or not, however, most Fours are aesthetically sensitive and concerned with self-expression and self-revelation, whether it be in the clothes they wear or in the overall nature of their often idiosyncratic lifestyles.
Fours are somewhat melancholic by disposition, and under stress tend to lapse into depression. They also tend to be self-absorbed, even under the best of circumstances, but when unbalanced, easily give way to a self-indulgence which they perceive as being fully justified as a way to compensate for the general lack of pleasure they experience in their lives. Rather than look for practical solutions to their difficulties, Fours are prone to fantasizing about a savior who will rescue them from their unhappiness.
Intellectual Fours tend to mistakenly type themselves as Fives, and a heavy wing can certainly exacerbate this tendency. Fours however, unlike Fives, tend to be self-revealing and comfortable with emotional expression.
Enneagram:
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Features:
The Heart Center: Moves towards others -
Underdeveloped feeling.
Original Loss: "I was too plain and common."
Problem Emotion: Sadness
Decision: Being unique and special allows you to survive and be loved.
False Claim: "I am not ordinary. I am one of a kind."
Four Adjectives: Intuitive and creative, but self-absorbed and depressive
Self-image: "I am different. I’m not like
you."
Compulsion: To be unique and have a special style.
Avoidance: Ordinariness, everyday commonness.
Sin: Envy
Gift: To bring out the unique, special qualities of a situation or a person.
Three Wing: More extroverted, upbeat, ambitious, flamboyant, and image-conscious.
Five Wing: More Introverted, intellectual, idiosyncratic, reserved, and depressed.
Stress Point: 2 - Excessive helping, compulsive intrusion, hysterical, and
desperate.
Security Point: 1 - Steady, principled action, distinguishes between feelings and
values.
Crossing the River: Uses fancy styles and even does
a water ballet.
Affirmation: "I will value each day no matter how ordinary."
Adjectives for High Functioning Fours:
Cherishes Beauty |
Artistically Expressive |
Self-aware |
Vulnerable |
Inspired |
Creative |
Intuitive |
Refined |
Sensitive |
Unique |
Personal and Revealing |
Imaginative |
Adjectives for Average Functioning Fours:
Self-Absorbed |
Feels Different |
Enigmatic |
Dreamer |
Special |
Moody |
Emotional |
Romantic |
Descriptive Adjectives for Low Functioning Fours:
Self-Reproachful |
Avoids Ordinariness |
Self-pitying |
Impractical |
Melancholic |
Depressed |
Despairing |
Alienated |
Tormented |
Hopeless |
Exempt |
Fears Success |
Famous Examples of Fours:
Jackie Onassis, Jeremy Irons, Paul Simon, Bob Dylan, Anne Rice, J.D. Salinger, Edgar Allen Poe, Prince, Judy Garland, Vincent Van Gogh, Marlon Brando, James Dean, Patsy Cline, Elizabeth Taylor, Janis Joplin, France - the Country.
Want this image above on your own blog, myspace, facebook, or website? Click here.
Fours are the poets and the artists. Well, fours are the starving artists. Sometimes, you know, you have to starve to get to the real stuff.
Fours are the masters of the emotional realm. Fours seem to be old souls. They have been around the block with heartache and even if they still get caught up in it they know there way around.
Some books say that fours are the jealous type. That’s bullshit. Fours don’t want what you have, they want something of their own… but it might be the same thing that you have.
You see fours are always out looking for how to make life better. That’s the thing- the aperture on the vision is so large that fours are trying to find ways to make LIFE better.
Fours can seem sort of down to others. Fours can seem sort of sad, but they really aren’t that sad at all. Once you get to know them, fours know a depth of feeling that none of the other types can TOUCH.
Fours are dag smat on the part of the enneagram that coincides with emotions. Yup, the thinking types see no logic in the four’s moves and the body types think fours are airy-fairy.
Fours are often lethally embarrassed. Or self-concious. Or both.
But that’s OK because despite what anyone might think, the four knows exactly what’s going on.
Quotes by an Enneagram Type Four:
“always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.” Judy Garland, Enneagram Type 4
“Whatever the next thing I write, it’s got to be even more naked than the last.”
Harold Pinter, Enneagram Type 4
“If we could learn to learn from pain even as it grasps us….”
Adrienne Rich, Enneagram Type 4
Have you ever wondered if you were the type you’ve been told? It’s not uncommon for you to be typed and go years believing you are a different type than you really are. That’s why I wrote Seven Steps to Find (or Affirm) Your Enneagram Type. Read it if you’ve ever wondered…
Do you know something I don’t? If this is your type, it’s quite likely that you do. Heck, I’m a Type 7, so I’m really only qualified to speak on behalf of us crazy 7’s. If you’d like to add something to this description, email me by clicking here and contribute to the World’s growing Enneagram Knowledge!
The desire to create and seek meaning is emphasized in the Individualist. They are emotionally driven, passionate people, who want to be recognized as special and distinguished from others. They are, at their best, compassionate, empathetic, and refined. This often leads them to artistic endeavors of various sorts, or alternatively, to relationships that would bring them intense feelings whether sublime or despairing. On the flipside, their emotional turbulances and excess fantasizing can cause difficulties with living in the moment, rather than in the past or in the future, chronic dissatisfaction and depression, and conflicts with others.
Basic Fear: “To have no identity and personal significance”. Personal identity is felt tentatively to the Individualist, which they compensate by cultivating a fantasy or ideal Self that would in one way or another define them. They fear ordinariness.
Basic Desire: ‘To find themselves and their significance’. The Individualists heighten their experience with imagination and emotional reactions. They see beauty in suffering, and will hold on painful moods if those give them meaning.
Parental Orientation: Disconnected from both parents, since “neither can understand.” Creates longing in self for a “good parent” - a saviour - who can understand them. It is not that fours do not want to express their feelings, they just want someone to discover them; and frequently make people work too hard to find out what they are.
From
a very early age, fours felt singled out by others. They see the
various personal qualities others have that are not given to them,
which causes them to focus on absence, on differences, and on personal
alienation. They are the gray ducklings poked fun of by their
bright-feathered peers and abandoned by their parents. They are the
orphans and outcasts.
In time, however, they began to feel that they’re singled out for a
reason. They interpreted their alienation and suffering as evidence of
their finer sensibilities, and even their personal defects, which in
the beginning tormented them, are now worn as marks of pride. However,
in their psychic recesses there remains an emptiness longing to be
filled by another, and it is that emptiness, that tension between lack
and fulfillment, which drives the fours in a search for meaning and
personal identity. Unfortunately, given their fixations on fantasy and
comparison with others, this search can often feel (and become)
fruitless.
Healthy 4w3’s can be both successful and inspired. They leave a personal touch in all the works they do, while maintaining some connection with the larger world. They enjoy public attention but are also committed to private self-exploration.
Average 4w3’s can be provocative and attention-grabbing, whether through art or life. Their emotional turbulances are more on the surface than the more withdrawn 4w5’s, and it often translates to immediate and widespread interpersonal impact. They can have problems with vanity and self-indulgence, and can resemble sevens in their love of luxury and pleasure. But unlike sevens, sensations are not sought in themselves but as another accessory to their fantasy identity. They tend to “hide away” once the problems with self-image caught up with them. They can also be competitive, play emotional games, and cause “dramas” of various sorts.
When 4w3’s are unhealthy, they are prone to hysteria and shallow/melodramatic emotional displays. They can have pronounced issue with self-image and shame. They feel justified to act selfishly because of their suffering. Narcissism and jealousy is also common.
Prince, Michael Jackson, Judy Garland, “Blanche DuBois”, “Madame Bovary”, Oscar Wilde, Marcel Proust, Gamart, Crov
Healthy 4w5’s brings profound creativity and insights of the intrapsychic sort. Their emotions are more under-the-surface than 4w3’s, and more private modes of communication (such as writing) are preferred. They have intellectual as well as emotional insights and can often synthesize experiences into something intensely personal yet timeless.
Average 4w5’s are devoted to cultivation of a personal worldview, often by philosophical or artistic means. They are more likely than the 4w3’s to be reclusive and out-of-touch with the greater social world, and to compensate they adopt unconventional/eccentric ways of life. They can be purposefully obscure and enigmatic in their expressions, then have an elitist and contemptuous view of those who failed to understand them. They tend to withdraw for prolonged periods under stress which can leave them further isolated. As a result, they are prone to hallucinatory states and total alienation.
Unhealthy 4w5’s inhabit a terrifying fantasy-world of their own creation. Their emotional torments are turned inward, causing severe depression and self-destructive thoughts. While average 4w5’s can romanticize death, unhealthy 4w5’s plunge into it.
Johnny Depp, Kurt Cobain, Bob Dylan, Virginia Woolf, “Lin Daiyu”, Søren Kierkegaard, John Keats, Sylvia Plath, Jack Kerouac
On the average levels, self-preservational Fours are the most practical of type Four. They are very concerned with the mood, atmosphere, and beauty of their surroundings, and can become self-indulgent in meeting those needs. They often have an aesthetic focus, are devoted to high-quality physical or emotional experiences, and can become frustrated if “the shades are off” their ideal. Some have a reckless streak, taking risks and playing with fate, as means to intensify their feelings. Others, while less adventurous, nonetheless fantasize to be consumed in some forms of risky affairs. Fours of this variant also have a heightened need for autonomy which can make them ambivalent and fickle in relationships.
Social fours are most characterized by a feeling of shame. They like to think of themselves as completely unique and one-of-a-kind, and can alternate between feeling socially inept and disdainful of others. They are somewhat more socially engaged than the other two variants of fours, often by adopting “personas” of some sort that they know are idealized versions of themselves. They also identify with alternative groups that in one way or another reinforce their outsider status. However, they can be easily overwhelmed socially and withdraw for long periods of time. Unhealthy social fours are extremely self-conscious and can have trouble with even the most casual human encounters.
The Fours of this variant are emotionally intense, and they express themselves through relationships and high-pitch lives. They have a competitive streak, and their emotions toward another (especially their love interests) run the gamut of total devotion and burning hatred. They are also the “face” of romantic poets and tortured artists, working in fervour on their art in between their outbursts of temper. They typically lead very unconventional lifestyles as a kind of personal statement. When in stress fours of this variant express their envy more openly, and can act out through violence or self-harm.
Riso, Don Richard. Personality Types: Using the Enneagram for Self-Discovery. Boston: Houghton Mifflin Company, 1987. ISBN 0-395-40575-0.
Riso, Don Richard and Russ Hudson. The Wisdom of the Enneagram: The Complete Guide to Psychological and Spiritual Growth for the Types. New York: Bantam Books, 1999. ISBN 0-553-37820-1. –Mathew 16:21, 12 August 2005 (UTC)
Romantics have sensitive feelings and are warm and perceptive.
How to Get Along with Me
What I Like About Being a Four
What's Hard About Being a Four
Fours as Children Often
Fours as Parents
Renee Baron & Elizabeth Wagele
The Enneagram Made Easy
Discover the 9 Types of People
HarperSanFrancisco, 1994, 161 pages
Acupressure on points
Fours tend to escape reality into a world of idealized fantasy; this weakens their sense of feeling at home in reality. Their tendency to feel unappreciated can also increase this sense of alienation. Strengthening the Root chakra can help to repair the damage caused by the Four's lack of presence in the physical world.
As Fours often focus on what they perceive to be their defects, they tend to lack self-confidence and to have low self-esteem. The resulting lack of assertiveness can be counteracted by doing Navel chakra meditations. This will also help with the Four's tendency to withdraw.
Opening the Heart chakra can help Fours to be more compassionate toward themselves and others. A strenghthened Heart chakra helps them to connect better to people and to cease obsessing about themselves.
Fours are known for their tendency to hold onto sadness and melancholy; they frequently suffer from depressive episodes. The acupressure points discussed below are useful for treating these difficulties.
The acupressure points LU-1, LU-3 and LU-9 are useful for treating the damage that is done to the body from feeling too much sadness. They are also helpful for increasing resistance to such feelings and for increasing a sense of self-worth.
As the Four's lack of a firm a sense of identity and feelings of diminished self-worth are partly rooted in a feeling of internal emptiness, working with the appropriate acupressure points can be helpful for treating the underlying problem.
Fours tend to hold onto their feelings, especially feelings of melancholy and sadness. LI-4 is especially indicated for letting go of such feelings, particularly feelings of loss. LIV-3 is also a useful point to work with when it is necessary to release pent up emotions of all sorts. As the inability to let go of one's feelings is a major cause of depression, working with LIV-3 is an especially beneficial point to access.
Fours find working with point SP-6 to be beneficial for several reasons. Like LIV-3, it has some effect in smoothing the flow of emotions, but it doesn't require the specific acupressure technique (reducing) that is used for LIV-3; it can simply be pressed. Also, SP-6 is indicated for counteracting the fatigue that is often caused by too much thinking, whether it be caused by worrying or endless fantasizing.
第四型人格是九型人格中的一型性格，名为浪漫者，又称为艺术型、自我型、凭感觉者。 健康的第四型是自我反省的、自觉的，不断“寻找自我”，和感觉与内在冲力有密切连系。对自己和对他人都很敏感、直觉；有同情心的、机智的、谨慎的、以及尊 重别人的。他们会自我表现，很有个性，很个人主义。享受孤独，从容地让无意识的内在冲力上升到意识层面。他们会自我表露，容易感动、但情感很坚强。最佳状 况：具有深奥的创造力，可以表达个人与众人的感受，可能以充满灵感的艺术作品来表现。在个人的层面上，他们具有革新与自我再生的能力，拥有自我创造、救赎 的特质，能够自身经验转化成有价值的东西。
有很多认为四号是内向的人格，其实不然，四号可以从最外向到最内向都有，外向的四号很容易结识朋友，内向的四号则像五号般充满神秘感。
目录[隐藏] |
从衣着品味和外形上他们富有个人风格，有眼光而不落俗套，讲究配搭和款色，有艺术家的气质，有时会十分突出而令人震惊。他们通常会拥有一双柔情似水的眼神，目光永远是有所憧憬和凝视著远方，有所思忆似的，却又感性而迷人。 心情完全会影响他们的决定。
健康的特点
一般的特点
不健康的特点
4w5： 倾向第五型，为人比较内向，冷淡疏远，需要空间，看事情很透彻。
4w3： 倾向第三型，为人比较外向，有野心，喜欢炫耀，精力充沛，做事比较积极，非常注意自己的形象和外表，也会像第七型那样喜欢搞笑。
第四型自小自觉被孤立。他们在别人身上看到种种自己没有的特质，因而着眼于缺失、差异和自我隔离。他们是遭父母遗弃、被同侪取笑的丑小鸭，是为世所弃的孤儿。
第四型渐渐会认为他们的孤立是有原因的。他们将孤立的苦痛看成拥有敏锐洞察力的凭证，而曾经困扰他们的缺点，亦表现为骄人的特质。然而，第四型的内 心深处仍渴望他人填补自己的虚空，而正是这种虚空和缺乏满足之间的拉据，令第四型追求意义与身份认同。可惜，因为第四型总着眼于与他人比较和幻想，令这种 追求感觉或变得徒劳。
四型侧翼三又称为贵族，又记作4w3。
健康的4w3可以很有成就以及充满创意。在跟更大的世界维持一些连系的同时，他们也会跟正在进行的工作保持个人接触。他们能融入公众场合，享受大众的注意力，但同时懂得享受独处，会为自我探索作出表态。
外露著丰富情感，无论生活与艺术均能引人注意。偶然像第七型人格般任性放纵，分别是四号所追求的是自我幻想和满足虚荣心。一般状态下的4w3无论在 艺术创作和日常生活中都会挑战常规以引人注意。他们比抽离内向的4w5更会将情绪波动表露于人前，对其他人造成很大的回响。他们有虚荣和自恋倾向，和追求 奢侈和快乐生活的第七型相似。不同的是，他们追求享乐不为个人享受，只是想满足自己幻想的身份。当个人形象的问题出现，他们通常会逃避。他们有好胜心，会 玩弄情绪，并在其他人面前进行角色扮演。
当4w3不健康的时候，他们倾向于展示歇斯底里、难以理解及戏剧性的情绪。他们可以同时宣称自己很自信及自卑。由于他们所受的痛苦，他们觉得作自私行为是情有可原的。自恋、妒忌、怨天尤人及多疑也是一种常见的现象。
王子, 迈克尔·杰克逊, 茱蒂·嘉兰, "Blanche DuBois", "Madame Bovary", 奥斯卡·怀尔德, 马塞尔·普鲁斯特, Gamart, Crov，张国荣
4w5 :放浪诗人（The Bohemian）
健康的4w5拥有非常的创意，而且对于内在心理自我（intrapsychic sort）带有深刻的洞察力。对比4w3，4w5们更加不容易表露自己的情绪，及喜欢如写作等更私人的沟通方式。
一般状态中的4w5极之重视建立自己的世界观，通常都会诉诸哲学或艺术。他们比4w3更容易与外面的世界脱节，有遁世的倾向，生活方式因此与其他人不同，甚至可说是奇怪。他们会在表达自己时故弄玄虚，含糊其词，并视自己为高人一等，轻视不明白自己的人。遇到压力时，他们会将自己长时间抽离，令他们更被孤立。他们很容易陷入幻想和隔离。
不健康的4w5会居住在他们自己构造的一个恐怖幻想世界中。他们情绪上的折磨会变得内在，构成严重的失落甚至自我摧毁思想。当一般的4w5能够把死亡浪漫化，不健康的4w5会陷入当中。
强尼·戴普、科特·柯本、鲍勃·迪伦、弗吉尼亚·伍尔芙、林黛玉、索伦·奥贝·克尔凯郭尔、约翰·济慈、Sylvia Plath、陈百强、王菲
一般状态下，以保存自己作目标的第四型是最实际的一型。他们十分重视自己的情绪，周遭的气氛和美丽的环境，故此沈醉在追求这些美好的事物。他们着重 美感，竭力于需索美好的经验。当这些理想不能实现时，他们会感到沮丧。有些人会表现鲁莽，故意冒险以对抗命运，来刺激自己的感官。即使不富冒险精神的人亦 会暗地里幻想英雄般悲壮地死去。这类人极需要自主，故此在一段关系中表现矛盾飘忽。
这类人经常感到羞愧。他们羞于与平凡的人为伍，将自己视为和其他人完全不同，要么在与人相处时十分困难，要么就对人轻蔑。他们在与人相处时比其他两 个副型积极，面对其他人时以理想的自己示人。他们喜欢与一些不为普通人喜欢和认同的人和组织为伍，以加强自己“另类”的形象。不健康的话，他们只会关心自 己，在普通的沟通也会出问题。
这个副型的第四型经常处于压力的情绪中，生活节奏急促。他们好胜，对其他人的感觉不是完全认同和奉献，就是完全憎恨和厌恶，这极端在面对他们所爱的 人尤其极端。他们常常表现成浪漫的诗人和受伤害的艺术家，常常在激情之后得到艺术上的灵感。他们以标奇立异的生活方式表达自己，在压力中他们会将自己的妒 嫉表露无遗，甚至会有暴力和自虐倾向。
Riso, Don Richard. Personality Types: Using the Enneagram for Self-Discovery. Boston: Houghton Mifflin Company, 1987. ISBN 0-395-40575-0.
Riso, Don Richard and Russ Hudson. The Wisdom of the Enneagram: The Complete Guide to Psychological and Spiritual Growth for the Types. New York: Bantam Books, 1999. ISBN 0-553-37820-1. --Mathew 16:21, 12 August 2005 (UTC)
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感情主导人格：2.助人者 | 3.成就者 | 4.浪漫者 |
第四型 - 自我型
愛反省，有藝術才能的類型。表情豐富，能給人深刻的印象，自我吸引，情緒變化無常。自我型散發出獨特的魅力。在他們 對好的詞語、創意及個人對產品的影響標准的追求上，他們不會妥協。他們不喜歡沒有創造力的工作。自我型對批評過度敏感，這一點可能會導致他們變得情緒無 常，工作沒有規律。在他們的最佳狀態時，他們能將直覺力和創造力帶到工作中來，並用他們有深度和獨特的感覺改善工作，他們會欣賞其他的各種型格。
一 . 形成性格的背景
二 . 外在表現
三 . 處於安定和人格提升時
走向第一型，會變得冷靜而較為理性，做事有原則及客觀，而不會再受控於變化無常的情緒。
四 . 處於壓力和自我防衛時
走向第二型，會在感情道路上一意孤行，癡纏，任性，佔有慾強，會失落，抑鬱和行為反覆無常。
五 . 健康的特點
六 . 一般的特點
七 . 不健康的特點
八 . 與其他人格之間的關係
與一號
兩入都渴望將一些美好的東西帶到世界當中。一號在四號複雜的感受及自我懷疑中提供意見。四號為一號在固執及理性當中帶來了創新、感覺及啟發。一號為四號帶來了自我控制而四號卻幫助一號去經驗不同的情感及熱情。若他們能互相欣賞對方，他們便能長久維持一段良好及平衡的關係。
潛在的難題
一號與四號的關係有時會互相衝突。一號常以為自己是一個合理及理性的人，但四號卻喜歡以主觀及感覺行事。雖然他們對生活有一些理想的看法。一號的理想多關注社會時事、政冶及道德等問題，但是四號的理想郤集中於個人的選擇及品味之上。
與二號
二號與四號能自由地分享他們的情感，他們都願意追求溫情及建立聯繫。二號樂意在有需要的地方伸出援手，外向及主動給予四號信心與其他人交往。四號為二號帶來創意、美感及豐富的感情，使二號能較為放鬆及充滿被愛護的感覺，也使彼此的關係能有更深的情感交流。
潛在的難題
二號與四號的關係有時會過份情緒化及充滿對對方不能明言的要求。兩種形號均需要注意及親密的感覺，漸漸會出現競爭。 二號會覺得四號太過情緒化並跟從感覺處事，而且對別人的關心不足夠。四號可感覺二號心底的情感渴望及需要被愛，但四號會妒忌二號的社交能力及別人對他們的 好感。
與三號
三號和四號都以情感反應為主導，所以他們的關係往往是熱切而有激情的。 他們都注重形像，對別人怎麼看自己的敏感，所以他們往往是一對高雅，有品味，有活力的伴侶。 四號可以帶給三號怎樣更深地感受自己， 能夠與自己內心深層的聯繫是一般三號重要的突破。 三號會帶給四號比較實際的技巧能力，如管理自己的情緒，或比較專業上的技能。
潛在的難題
雙方都需要別人注意自己，也會暗地裡把自己與別人比較，或與人競爭。 當然這會影響關係，把對方看成障礙。 其實雙方往往都不能看到真正的對方，而是自己需要的投射。 四號可能把三號看成自己的拯救者，擁有一切自己所需的特質。 三號則可能把四號神秘而奇特的戰利品，得以提高自己的吸引力。
與四號
和一般雙號型的關係沒分別，兩位四號都會帶給對方相同的特質，然而他們性格上各自的健康程度和主導本能，在這種雙號 型的關係中更形重要。雙四的親密關係，通常有著很深的友誼基礎，因為四號常常感到不被別人所明白，所以很自然會跟其他四號在此方面有著特殊的共鳴。他們互 相傾訴種種故事，如童年的不快，私底下的夢想，或是令他們失落的事情。雙方在情感上的表達都抱開放的態度，對相方在心靈上的需要都十分敏感，雙方都同樣地 尋找著對方的認同，而在一段雙四的關係中，他們是有很高的成功機會。
因為雙方對自己和對方的情感都很瞭解，這段關係存在著溫柔及互相尊重。在這安全的環境中，雙四可以從成長路上的黑暗和孤寂中找尋到一點會心微笑。在互相的支持下，他們亦無懼揭開深處的創傷或其他個人的難題。
雙四亦很鼓勵對方在創作上和藝術上來表達自我，並可以從中溝通．．．因為雙方的頻率相同，他們覺得這段關係可以帶來安全感。雙方都感覺到他們不再那樣孤單，那樣的有所缺憾。
雙四的關係是高度浪漫和具豐富的理想。作為一對情侶，他們的親密關係是有潛能發展成一段可歌可泣的愛情故事。情感上的激流，希望與絕望，喜悅跟無助 ... 種種色彩都會經常掩蓋他們的日常生活，育兒或工作都會受到一定的影響。
巨大的真誠，深海般的情感交流，希望擁有自己的故事，都是這段關係的標誌。
潛在的問題
情感上的波動是雙四關係的問題徵結所在：雙方各自都很容易跌進自我當中，時刻都量度著自己在這關係中的位置 ── 得過什麼（或未得到什麼）。各自都想自己在情感上成為焦點。雙方同時間想得到特別對待，當對方有同一要求時亦感到憤怒。雙方渴望找到理想，但當對方的要求 未達到時，內心亦會變成沮喪的根源。他們會不自覺地跟對方競賽：誰才是最受傷害？雙方其實在心底下都尋找著拯救他們的人。
雖然四號對人有著極高的敏感度，他們很多時都會選擇遠離其他人，和當他們與某人有爭執時，他們會收回他們的注意和感 情。四號有著一種極深的對人不信任，而這種不信任連自己最親密的人也不例外。而當一個四號時常去測試對方時，另外的一位四號會很快感到難受。對方種種的變 更，他們之前的情感敏感度都會令人懊惱。四號會開始對他的伴侶不寬容，令對方感到在蛋殼上挑骨頭，用臉色操控對方。
雙四關係中，他們是可以很喜怒無常，自我封閉，消極的，積極進取的及蔑視，對眼前的人抱著怨恨──縱使是一個自己曾 經深愛的人。雙方可能互相摒棄對方，經常的罵戰，可能不受控制而做成難以補救的傷害。當在衝動的一刻，說出一些難以收回的說話，他們曾經所建立的信任和安 全感，會永久性地被破壞。當這一段關係的面臨終結時，便會難以再復甦。
與五號
雙方型號都會將一些在個人發展上感到豐富及特別的特質帶進這段關係：四號會帶來藝術及情感上的氣質，內省的習慣及對 己對人的敏感感覺；五號會帶來一種詢問和好奇的氣質，一種每事問和對各種各樣事物感興趣的習慣，他們不介意放下（過時）舊有的思想。四號會貢獻美學上的欣 賞和心靈上的發現。兩種型號都喜歡私人空間及深度，他們不介意用時間去探索事物和慢慢地品嚐種種豐富的經驗。四號和五號也許有他們不同的興趣，但他們會欣 賞及尊重不同的角度，對伴侶的感覺和興趣給予很大的空間。
對人的影響：四號是不會輕看感覺及下意識運作的力量。
兩種型號都可以極度有創意，而雙方亦喜歡與對方分享他們的發現。廣泛、刺激及開放的交談，成為四號跟五號關係中的標 誌。這些交流上的激情及他們對雙方的誠懇，都可以在這型號的關係中找到。四號和五號通常都帶些特別的幽默感，他們對奇異東西的喜好，都給予這段關係一種古 怪及獨特的味道，這是因為他倆都有"局外人"的感覺。五號用不同的角度和世界觀將四號帶出自我的世界。四號幫助五號聯繫到他們的自我感受。他們對對方有一 種很強的容忍力，因為雙方都不是很容易受驚的型號。他們都覺得對方有趣，及不介意對方的古怪習慣。雙方都能引發對方的創意，給予對方空間及支持去發掘個人 的夢想。
潛在的問題
四號跟五號配對上的最大分歧，是在於情感型的四號傾向於過度要求更多的交流及情感，而思想型的五號會傾向要求更多的 空間和獨處。對於四號的要求，五號通常變得更加隱退。四號會開始感覺到五號過於思想化，覺得五號是分析他們多於對他們的感受有同感。四號亦會覺得五號太過 分離，心不在焉和對自己在這段關係/情感上的需要毫不關心。四號亦會認為他們太不切實際，當事情需要即時反應時卻遲遲不行動。
另一方面，五號會看四號是一個情感渴求的無底深坑，浪費他們的時間和能量。五號亦會認為四號的情感上落是種不合理及 不成熟的標誌，有著潛在的危險。四號因為得不到五號的注意力而挑釁對方直至得到回應。要這段關係成功，四號要尊重五號極簡抽象的情感表達形式，而五號亦要 尊重四號在感受上的要求深度。浪漫關係可能因為一息間的火熱而自焚，在這情況下，通常五號是會首先退下，感覺到被四號的過度渴求所淹沒。當然五號的退避自 然會加深四號的癡纏，造成更多的渴求和纏繞，引致五號對這段關係的數之不盡的分析：澎湃的情感對著情感抽離及理性分析，很快便會造成僵局或分手。
與六號
四號跟六號雙方其實有著很多的共鳴，尤其是他倆都是高度情感化及在人前的一份不安全感。雙方都有著強烈及即時的感 覺，他倆亦會跟隨他們下意識的靈感。因為這些共通的特質，六號通常誤以為自己是四號。這些特質亦是他倆賦予這段關係的重要元素，令他倆對對方都可以有著不 凡的同理心和忍耐。四號跟六號可帶給大家一種靈伴的感覺，因為他倆都能明白到對方的受威脅感，及對外人的不信任。他們活像一對踏風的孤兒，彼此支持，互相 照顧。當雙方都在健康狀態時，他倆會傾向支持及穩定對方而不是耗盡對方。他們是對方一個最好的傾訴對象，去宣洩一些向外不能宣洩的憂慮和控訴。
四號帶著一種感性和性感，及他們表白情感的能力，包括一些連六號自己也不知怎樣表達的情感。四號會談及他們的內心世 界：一些六號可以加以學習的地方。六號賦予這段關係勤奮、實際、忠誠及對安全感要求．．．他們通常十分友善和突然地愛開玩笑，可以紓緩四號有時的壞心情及 自我封閉。四號給予六號一種被需要的感覺，無形中幫助了六號建立更多信心去面對其他事物。六號喜歡實際的習慣，亦幫助到四號發展他們創作的潛能。六號像一 穩定的地台般付出時間及支持去幫助四號處理他們的情感，這種型號的組合產生穩定及大膽、平衡和互補長短的關係。
潛在的問題
如上述提及過，四號和六號都有著被維繫的情意結。當雙方在不健康狀態時，他倆都會傾向敏感、批評對方、悲觀和容易受 沖擊。雖然他們不會容易說出口，而是他倆都會用不同的方法來試探對方對自己的忠誠。雙方會不經意地收起感情來保護自己不被對方需要，但諷刺地，這種行為會 製造到自我預言的實現，造成他們最不想面對的局面。雙方開始變得互相依賴，而這種依賴反而幫助不了他們任何一方。四號不會自動變得實際，六號亦不會自然變 得對自己更瞭解。
另外一個潛在的問題，是在於四號和六號對變化的容忍度。一般來說，四號是比較自我發展和自我成長，他們也比較願意大
膽嘗試不同的東西。六號則是比較保守和對變化抱著懷疑的態度，這兩種態度很容易造成衝突，令四號覺得六號在創作及成長的路上卻步。雙方都可以十分悲觀和自
我懷疑，不開心及對他人不信任。四號一般對六號的投訴，是他們不夠自由自在和不夠浪漫，而六號對四號的不滿包括了不可靠和做事太衝動，被不穩定的情緒所影
響。兩種型號都是十分敏感及被動，所以衝突可以很快加劇，彼此誤會可勾出各自的情緒投射及過劇的過敏反應。
